Hurricane English

We had another big party here last night; it was phenomenal. I managed to get most of the swim team to come over and partake in the festivities. This one was the 'encore' to our last party - the infamous 471 Shakedown of two weeks past. It definitely lived up to its billing. I'll briefly gloss over the highlights:

• Our landlord, Dennis, came over and played a game of beirut with us. This officially makes Dennis the coolest landlord of all time.
• I've never been much of a 'rut player, but I was on point last night. Mike and I ran the table pretty early on. It was sweet.
• Scott and I broke our George Forman grille with a few well-placed drop kicks and a hammer. Similar treatment was given to our wall clock and our TV remote.
• Sean 'Hurricane' English lived up to his reputation, verbally abusing every female guest at the party, singing loud songs and drinking more than his share of vodka.
• Gilbert did a keg stand, Gene teared up, and many pitcher relays were completed.
  
• He proceeded to flying-elbow-drop our coffee table (at my request) until it collapsed and then went into a berserk rage. He destroyed several glass objects, one chair, his own shirt, and flipped nearly every piece of furniture in the family room.
• He also tried to bench-press the sofa and passed out on the floor.
  
• Scott, Alex and I made some sweet macaroni and cheese at three or four in the morning
• The main floor looked like a warzone. I'm not exaggerating.
• Ryan slept through the entire party AND the clean-up the next day. When he walked down the stairs, it was as if nothing had ever happened the night before.
• It was awesome. I love college.